Friday, February 25, 2011

How Do I Know This Is Good? Sample G


Reasons I Was Moved

-       - The paper immediately tells you what it is about and what it will be trying to prove, pulling the reader in.
-       - It gives examples of everyday American life, and then ties it in to Red Bull
-       - The research and quotes used help to make the paper more convincing
-       - The paper has the fast-paced mentality that it is saying society as a whole has
-       - The comparison of success of Red Bull versus the lack of success of relaxation drinks
-       - The use of Red Bull’s advertising slogan to prove a point and talk about society

Reasons I Was Unmoved

-       - The fast-paced rhythm of the paper made it feel like you were getting a lot at once
-      -  There were not many transitions between ideas
-       - Although the paper listed stressful situations it did not say how Red Bull would be appealing to them
-       - There were a few typos, which mad the paper seem less professional
-       - Although the ideas were comparing society to Red Bull, it felt like there were long stretches in between them
-       - The papers main tying points were only the beginning and the end and felt like the middle was different arguments, not tied in until the end

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